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Judge's decision

Wild bluebell
Well I have had news on decree nisi. The judge has thrown it out because he wants specific dates the adultry was committed, even though my Stbx has admitted it. What does it matter? So I have to pay another £95 and associated sol costs for a new petition. I can't understand it! Mt solicitor doesn't understand it! It just drags everything on. I have decided not to have any contact with Stbx at all, after he abused me on the phone the other day and I cried for a day and a half. The kids both have mobiles but at the minute have decided not to see him, so there are no arrangements to be made. He can make his own arrangements and contact, I guess I don't have to get involved. I have tried to be as amicable as I can, but him and his ow are out to get me and for my own sanity I need to look after myself so I can be strong for the kids.

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Thanks again, it feels like I am just starting the whole process and I am 2 years down the line since I found out. I think the future is scary, I feel physically sick at the money we are both going to have to spend, that's my kids future, but I know I have to stand my ground, I am no use to him now and so he will do everything in his power to make me as financially poor as he can, of course he has his mad ow whispering in his ear. So I have no chance of him doing the decent thing. Oh I will fight, he has no idea, the strength I can muster.
"I need to look after myself" thats the hardest lesson to learn. Its you, then the kids. I am amazed to hear people on this site trying to be reasonable, amicable when they are on their knees and are routinely treated like sh8t. Well done WB, start the fight back :-)
So sorry Wild Bluebell,
As if it wasn't difficult enough.I have been warned of this.Seems very harsh though to the injured party especially when it has been admitted too.
Stay strong ((()))

Juliette/vastra liking your thought processes x


Very appealing! Actualy I prefer a tropical jungle re-education camp for mine, full of mozzies. No internet, no books, just cleaning toilets all day on a diet of baked beans and sloppy porridge.
"Confession Statement"...sounds like something communist chinese would force you to sign before sending you on 15 years re-education camp....strange, the idea of sending ex in outer mongolia to grow beans seems very appealing.....
Thanks everyone, it is a set back, I just hope he doesn't change his mind and wriggle out of admitting it but I have plenty proof from the ow, she text me the gory details, where and when in my house, I think faced with that he will take the easier route.

I am much better when I stick to no contact, and although I have tried to be reasonable, she stirs the s&@t, so it's best in the long run, let them get on with their mills & boon , them against the world, romance. Me and the kids are fine thank you xxxx
I guess the process is different for everyone. I was lucky in that my solicitor kept us out of court and we got my ex to sign a 'confession statement' ref adultery. This was an interesting process in itself! Good Luck and stay strong.
Is it the 6 month rule? Does the judge think the adultery may have been condoned? I fell into this trap myself when I gave f*ck wit a second chance.
THat sounds very dodgy, and verging on voyeuristic! What does it matter to the judge, and how can it help anyone to have dates? Surely he or she knows adulterers are so immersed in lies that they can't be trusted anyway?! Keep up the no contact, stay strong xx
Good grief that sounds bonkers to me. But then the world seems bonkers to me these days, can't make head or tails out of it. Sorry you've had this additional setback. One step forward, two steps back and yet we get there in the end. Chin up x
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