Feeling a bit deflated today. I should be handing in my dissertation and finishing uni with my friends, but instead i am sat at home still trying to finish said dissertation with a few thousand words still to go! I have applied for an extension based upon stbxh throwing yet more crap at the fan, but i wont know if i have it until the 17th so i'm running the gauntlet by not having it ready in time. I'm glad of the extra time, god knows what would have happened if i didnt have that option! One of my tutors is fully behind me and supporting me in my application and ready to fight my corner should i need to appeal so thats positive, but the pictures and statuses of my friends and classmates on fb is striking a chord!! Things with stbxh are as up and down as usual. We're amicable when its something he wants yet when i try and discuss matters such as why he has stopped paying his CSA my emails are ignored. I try and keep him in the loop regarding our child and what she's up to, but very often get the impression i am wasting my time, why i continue to bother i dont know!! Mediation is on hold until i finish my studies - mediators suggestion not mine, but very welcome - and according to the local courts the divorce isnt going anywhere quickly either. Stbxh hasnt replied to the papers even though his solicitors has said he would. I just feel stuck in a rut at the moment. Not finished uni, not divorced, contact issues on the horizon, no job. Does anyone have a fast forward button? Six months would do!!
(((JS))) You have had to contend with so much. You will get through this too because you are so committed and determined to succeed. I hope the Uni grants you an extension too.. fingers and legs crossed for you. You will look back on day on the trials and tribulations of your life one day and acknowledge your own strength even if you don't see it now. Your daughter will understand those sacrifices you have made for her too. All the best my friend.
JS, I hope by now you've had time to sleep on it and realized it's the very last hurdle and it's not insurmountable. You sound exhausted and that's possibly why it seems daunting at the moment. Keep working away on your writing but with fingers crossed that you get the extension. (Difficult to type with your fingers crossed I know.)
Take regular breaks away from the computer. Can you get help with the proofreading and save yourself some time there? Reward yourself for every few completed pages or a section. Stop and have a treat. Call a friend, browse through a magazine then get back to it.
You're very close to success now. Stay focused on the dissertation finished, bound and ready to hand in. You can do this. You've proved over and over that you can do it, it's just your time that's running away with you. Hope you get the extension. xx
J,as Ruby has said this is only temporary,
A blip in the grand scale of your life.
You have achieved so much while dealing with so much stress
God I know that I definatly would never have achieved a fraction of what you have,given the circumstances.
I can appreciate you feeling a bit down and out of the loop regarding your friends,but they will celebrate with you when it's your turn ;)
The life that is waiting for you and L is just around the corner,okay the corner feels a little wide at the minute,but you will edge your way around it,then you will reap the benefits of all this hard work.
Things have not gone the way you planned those years ago,but the life your forging will be a great one,and remember you worked extremely hard to get to this place,and we are all proud of you and your dedication.
We can all lie back and see what our future is,or we can go seek that future and work towards it,this is what you have done,you sought it and worked with it,so now will be your reward........
Sorry to hear you feel stuck, Js. This is a temporary situation. try focusing on one or two things at any given time; right now your dissertation is the important one - finish this, then you can finish Uni; the divorce is underway and there isn't anything you can do to hurry that along; deal with any contact issues when and if they happen. Focus on what you can do, rather than what you have yet to face.
You will get "there", sooner than you think - hang on in there.