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another day in single land..

T Updated

well after a positive start to the week, things have been tricky but I am trying not to let it get me down too much.

Yesturday I went to my Jobcentre interview, 'New Deal for Lone Parents', after waiting an hour finally got seen, and when I told them of my health problems the fact I am on severe disability benefit, son has special needs etc they said they didn't expect me to look for work, and that I would be transferred to the 'sick-long term' lot, and would just get a reminder that they were there if I should feel like a bit of training at any time.So left with a bit of felling of relief I haven't got to try to work as well as all my other problems.

Then I went to my parents where s2bx has written to my 74 year old mother and 79 year old dad telling them he wants to meet them face to face in the street, like he wants a stand up fight as they have been less than complementary about him and his new partner in front of son.How cowardly is it to threaten old people. Its just typical of him, and shows what a horrible person he is.

I realise its not good to do this in front of son, but parents have their own opinions and he is so obviously now not the person everyone thought he was (devoted husband caring for sick wife/ adoring children).

Today I woke up exhausted , I always am to an extent with my illness, but have had bad sleeps the past few nights.Every night since the weekend s2bx has telephoned and turned every converstation into a arguement.

Can't think why he thinks I have to put up with his bad temper and opinions now we aren't together.I put the phone down and he apologised but it is as if the past 24 years have been for nothing.

He wants me to give him some pictures of him and the kids without me in them.. I can't face looking at my photos now I know he has been lying to me about how he feels and living a double life for 3 years. So he can do that himself.

Even getting out the Christmas stuff for decorations has been hard, knowing that this time last year I was happy, and this year I feel so sad and alone,but I now know last year he was pretending, and this year he won't be.He has even said he is going to get my sons gift to me. Why bother?I certainly will get him nothing.

A good thing is that we have our financial mediation appointment set up so the sooner that is all sorted out and finalised the better.



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