i have been thinking alot today about a couple I know that are on the verge of splitting up. I don't know them very well, more a friend of a friend and a Facebook friend. However I could tell something wasn't right. The wife used to post lots of lovely and funny stories and photos of her lovely and much yearned for young family, the gorgeous house in the countryside they had refurbished and extended, and the walks close to their home in idyllic surroundings with dogs and childeren in tow. Plus the horse she loves to ride. Then the images changed to endless selfies, different poses in front of the mirror and just recently drunken nights out. Even though as I said, I don't know them that well I could see the signs and I heard yesterday she has had an affair. I can't stop thinking about them today. I family, yet again torn apart. I know, as many of us do on here just how painful it all is and how much they will lose. I wonder if she realises just how much damage she is doing, not only to her husband and childeren but other family members too. Do people that cheat just feel there is no way out of their unhappy marriage, that the easy option is to have an affair? I know from my experience that it causes so much unhappiness and hurt, it really isn't the easy option. That although I have moved on and am happy now, it is still a scar and one that will always be there. There will always be Repercussions and problems when you have a tie with childeren. Obviously the things she craved for havnt been enough to make her happy and she will probably now lose most of them, only then will she realise what are the important things in life, the people you love. I only hope they don't get too damaged along the way.
This pursuit of happiness is over-rated. Better to live life with all its up and downs to have a life rich in experience.
(Written snuggled up next to a radiator when I could be out in a field.... shooting vermin? flying a kite? recovering from a swim in a river?)
I think you right in many cases Vastra. One of the first things my now ex said to me is that he had to think of his own happiness. Well he is living the same life he had before working all hours making their house very similar to the one he left, he certainly doesn't look very happy and he has ripped his family apart in the process. It's like watching the whole thing in slow motion, so sad.
It's sad seeing others repeat the train wreck of marriage breakups due to infidelity. I'm generalising here, but I wonder how "unhappy" the cheaters really were prior to the affair. So often the story seems to be that the cheater allows themselves to get involved with an OP, and that infatuation feeling provides such an exciting contrast to the humdrum of busy married life, Next comes the "I've been unhappy for years" sad sausage story which justifies the cheating. This whole "I have a right to be happy" mantra is such a hollow philosophy.