A well respected, award winning social enterprise
Volunteer run - Government and charity funded
We help 50,000 people a year through divorce

01202 805020

Lines open: Monday to Friday 9am-5pm
Call for FREE expert advice & service info

Inside of us !!!

A Updated
After my breakup,I did wonder how I would manage without him emotionally.You know the times,when things go wrong,just having him there to talk through them,but then again I got through the breakup without him... I have gone on and made myself a more enriched life,new friends,experiences etc..and actually without any major blips along the way. Over the last few weeks,something has happened in my life that has completely rocked it,and I know that Twonk would have talked this rationally through with me,but I have not told him.As my wiki friends can testify,I am a relatively strong person,but I sat and blubbed in GP's office for well over my allocated time,so not me.Actually crying liking that to a virtual stranger was in a way cathartic...He was not judging me,he was just there to help. Upshot is,a few weeks from work.. My family and friends know all about this,so the net has closed in on me,its text,calls Facebook messages constantly,then the house visits,and we seem to be going out more. Quite a few of us went to lunch on Wednesday,which turned into a liquid tea and supper lol,and many things were discussed.My issue was the topic for a while,and I told them all I knew what they were doing,they were not letting me muse over things,but they all had their own lives also. My words were all brushed aside,with jokes etc.Then the soberest one amongst said"Why are you questioning us?we are doing for you, a fraction of what you have done for us and others" Actually they maybe right on some things,but actually I don't support because I have to,but because I want too,just like my friends are supporting me. Throughout the bad times you find who are the real people in your life,and unfortunately the fakes also.Although the ultimate lies in ourselves,I thought I would never manage without him emotionally, but I have,I have found that massive inside of me called strength,that thing we all have when we need it... Of course,having exceptional people around you helps also

User comments

8 comments
To write a comment please register or
Comment
Thanks all for the support,
Your messages of support mean a lot to me,obviously I know some of you personally,and some of you virtually,but in a weird way we are all friends,in the way we support each other.
I am lucky that I have good friends around me,and 2 amazing daughters, who once again have shown how fiercely they support me.Having this network helps in so many ways,I know Twonk would have gone through this issue with me,but others have also,and actually their perspective is the one I know will be right one.

Slowly but surely I am getting where I usually am,that happy smiley face is coming back,but I have to admit,a lesson learned yet again :(
Although life is all about lessons,some good some bad,we all learn from them.....

Once again,Thank you all,your all amazing people
:) :) :) :)

Cwtchs
Afon Xxxx
A
Comment
Hi Afon

So sorry to hear you are having a tough time at the moment. You do have a lot of inner strength, you also have a good network of people around you. These people came to support you and that's lovely, being looked after by others is a good thing, it allows them to show you how much they care for you. Divorce affected every single relationship I had with others. Some have grown and got stronger, some are strained and some have not survived. I won't forget some of the things people did for me when he first left and in my own way whenever it's needed I do what I can for those people. My kids saved me Afon, and held me tight during some very dark times. You do indeed learn who is who.

Let the arms of all your friends and family wrap around you and keep you safe. Your arms can take a well deserved rest for a bit....

Warmest wishes to you Hun

LG xXx
L
Comment
When we are hurting, it sometimes can feel odd that others are taking care of us for a change. I'm sorry to read you are having a rough time and wish you better times ahead.

The reality is you don't need Twock anymore for anything.

Take care of yourself.
S
Comment
I have a feeling that they will always be our initial go to response, we spent so long with them. Well done you that you can analyse it so.

Far more importantly though, whatever it is that has happened I'm sending you huge hugs X
D
Comment
Sending best wishes from Oz too. I wonder if we will ever lose that natural response to wish for our former partners' support and comfort when you've just got some bad news, I don't think so. But it sounds like your fabulous friends are more than making up for his absence. x
V
Comment
Afon so sorry to hear you've been having a difficult time. You were quite right to go to the GP and hopefully with a few weeks off work you'll be feeling rested and refreshed.

I think we when we begin to feel better after the horrible divorce stuff, getting through the shock of it, sorting all the finances out, making sure are kids are okay, keeping our jobs going - the whole effort it takes is just exhausting and then the 'blip' comes. And it is a temporary blip. You'll be fine again soon. So pleased you have lovely people in your life to support you.

Love Em x
E
Comment
I am sorry you have been going through a tough time recently and it seems to have been another step in your new life. Learning how to get through an upsetting challenging time without the help of the twonk. You have found that you have support from other places which helps and it sounds like your friends have really appreciated all the support you have given them in the past. We.do need to be looked after others sometimes in times of vulnerability.
S
Comment
your words are so true.i have found so much support from my friends as i have turned from the strong capable person i was into a blubbering wreck.
i feel so blessed that they have kept me going through some of the worst moments of my life so far.
thay have also siad that they are repaying me for all i have done for them in the past but as you said thats what you do for your friends.
stbx has no one at his back so really i am the lucky one.just doesnt feel like it some days.
maybe we are all stroger than we think but i am determined not to let him get me to the dark place i was in when he left.

M3