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B Updated
Money worries have been the theme of the week along with my future security which will be the focus of the consent order. I am interpreting this new focus as being progress, my head being clear enough to start thinking about long term practical matters. The past 3 months, not even 3 months, have been expensive. The retainer for my lawyers, house valuations, paying off troublesome debts to clear the way for future mortgage applications have wreaked havoc on my small savings pot. I need to make peace with these outgoings: I won't need to pay them again - they're one-offs, expensive but necessary. I've spent a lot of money on a flight home and will need spending money, but I am looking at that as an investment in my spiritual well-being. To be on home ground with old friends will uplift me and I am willing to take the hit. It's important for me to remember the good work I've done on my finances. I am lucky to have a job that gives me enough money to pay my bills and still give me enough money to have a social life. Water and electricity are cheaper living alone. I remember to turn the air-con up to 80 degrees when I leave the house in the morning and am careful to only put a load of washing on when I have a full load. I look for deals in the supermarket and bulk buy the big stuff such as kitchen roll and toilet rolls. I keep an accounts spreadsheet that breaks down what I'm spending and on what items. I batch cook soups, chowders, paellas and stews to take for lunches and I keep a big pot of yoghurt and a bag of muesli in the office for my breakfast every day. I budget and I am careful. These are all small wins, but mean that I have control over the money I do have. Looking at the long term, things will get a little easier once the consent order is agreed. I am dreading the negotiations but am looking forward to the day when it's agreed and I no longer have to worry about it. It will also mean no more emails with the soon to be ex husband and the progress of my divorce, and that will be the most valuable thing of all.

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