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Patterns

HeadKnowsHeartDoesnt
Updated
Many of you lovely people on here have spoken about patterns of behaviour from your exs. I've had from mine: It's all about Me, Me, Me I'm sorry - let's try again When it didn't work - Woe is Me I'm so unhappy - what have I done I don't want to be alone Come back to me, come back to me, come back to me I'm really really really sorry - I can't believe I've done this Angry - why are you treating Me like this Why do you want a Divorce I hate you I don't want to see you to the latest one - let's try and be friends and What can I do to make this right for you Typical pattern or not? Any ideas what else I can expect to come along next? xx

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The area of focus for me was not giving the irrational behaviour headspace.

Key for me was not to subject myself to it. Wasn't sure what was worse. The ramblings of a deeply dysfunctional man or me choosing to listen to it.

So, no contact. Was no point to it. Words are just that. Noise that comes from someone's mouth. His behaviour never changed. So I stayed away. That was the new pattern.
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I can see them patterns but half from her half from me. The have your cake and eat it attitude she had when she thought I was seeing someone else, getting upset and crying when I went out, like she has any reason to cry. I've found a new way of trying to deal with the emotions and sadness I feel when I start to get low I think to myself that I KNOW in my heart that this fling won't last and that she will be alone soon too. It gives me some pleasure, probably not the right word but it gives me a sense of justice that she will soon realise what she lost. She lost me, the one person in this world that loved her more than life and it's going to hurt her and it will hit her hard. By that time I will be long gone from her in my head I hope.
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.....And the classic, "It's your fault that I leapt into bed with someone else...."
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"Why are you being so hostile?" (!!!)

"I pity you"
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Ditto to above also...

Now it's,"S,divorce really suits you,you are looking really happy"

If only he knew ;) :)
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I've had all of those, and I'm willing to bet most of the other wikis have too. But you are missing one:
'I never wanted a divorce, it was what you wanted, not me'