Marital home - options

My husband and I separated in September.

We are now trying to work through the marital home situation.

2 kids, 8 and 13 (boy and girl)
4 bed house
equity of approx £180K
Earnings - me £52K, him £47K
I have debts of approx £8K
I have final salary pension, he has police pension
share of childcare is 80% me, 20% him (either 1/2 nights per week)
He is currently renting a one bedroom flat
He is paying me CM of £400 per month

I cannot afford to buy him out of the marital home
I cannot afford to buy a 3 bedroom house in the area we live

He wants to sell and get his equity now. Says his solicitor has told him that the courts will order that he is able to give children a similar standard of accommodation for when they stay with him e.g. bigger house.

He says he cannot get a mortgage for a 2 bed place.

He is demanding I sell and purchase a 2 bed flat/house. I don't really want to do that as ideally I want the kids to have a room each due to their ages.

He has said I will have to share a room with my youngest child or the children will have to share a room together.

We have both submitted financial information to our solicitors. I haven't heard anything back from my solicitor for ages.

Any advice on what I need to do/my rights?

Take anything that starts with "My solicitor says...." with a pinch of salt. It won't ever be anything in your favour!

You don't say how old you are or how much a 3 bed house would cost but with your salaries you should both be able to raise mortgages. See how much you could get.

Ideally you would each have a 3 bed house but if this can't be done it can't be done. Remember a house doesn't need to be owned. Given the ages of your children and that they are opposite sexes sharing a room wouldn't be seen as appropriate. Expecting you to share with a child sounds ridiculous.

Thanks, I've realised that anything his solicitor says is never good for me!!

3 bedroom houses in this area are anything upwards from 380K minimum. This would be for a house which would need work doing to it.

I have been told I could get a mortgage for anything between £215 and £245 depending on the lender. That, plus my equity wouldn't be enough, particularly when you factor in stamp duty, solicitors fees and estate agent fees.

We are both 45.

Rental prices start at approx. £1300 per month for a 3 bed house.

happydaysahead wrote:

Thanks, I've realised that anything his solicitor says is never good for me!!

That's because you only get told the selected bits and then probably an edited or misinterpreted version. Plus you have to remember the solicitor will only have been able to advise on the information they have been given!

3 bedroom houses in this area are anything upwards from 380K minimum. This would be for a house which would need work doing to it.

I have been told I could get a mortgage for anything between £215 and £245 depending on the lender. That, plus my equity wouldn't be enough, particularly when you factor in stamp duty, solicitors fees and estate agent fees.

We are both 45.

Rental prices start at approx. £1300 per month for a 3 bed house.

Could you afford the mortgage on the current home from your own income? If so that may be an option with him having a deferred charge.

You need to know pension values as well really. His salary suggests Sergeant with fairly long service to date? Depending on how long you have been in yours it may be worth similar or more than his.

I have a mortgage offer to take over the mortgage on the marital home myself.

However, husband wants his equity now and I cannot afford to add the equity to my mortgage.

So we are a bit stuck.

We have both got our pensions valued and the information has been given to solicitors.

Thanks for your advice...

happydaysahead wrote:

However, husband wants his equity now and I cannot afford to add the equity to my mortgage.

How does he know he has any equity? It is part of the pot to be divided by agreement or order of the court.

If you can get a mortgage in your own name so free him from the current mortgage he will be better off than a lot of people who end up tied to a mortgage for years.

What are the pensions worth?

What is FMH likely to sell for?

FMH will probably sell for approx £390. It's 4 bed but not in a good area. Unfortunately, 3 bedroom houses are not very different in price, so I'd be downsizing with little financial difference.

If it sold for £390 there would be £180 equity. He is assuming he would get 50% of that, and this is what he wants now, which means I need to sell the house to be able to give it to him. But that leaves both of us unable to purchase a house independently.

I could probably get a 2 bed flat or house, but ideally wanted a 3 bed so the kids can have a bedroom each.

I think our pensions are probably worth about the same, everything has been provided to our solicitors but I haven't heard anything back from mine for a couple of weeks.

I am more than happy to take the existing mortgage on myself with a legal agreement that when I do sell he gets 50% of equity at that point, and I can afford this. I suggested this to him, but he says that doesn't work for him, he wants his equity to enable him to purchase a bigger property because a financial advisor has told him he needs to 'buy property asap'.

However, it seems that this is impossible for either of us!!

I am the one who instigated the divorce so he feels it's unfair that he has been pushed out of his home so understandably wants to be able to get himself a new home.