Advice and opinions needed and appreciated.

Cheers Mike, I know you wasn't being abrasive and emotions aside are obviously essential. So I wholely appreciate your comments.
I have put much thought into how would I feel if I came off worse by going to court and realistically I find this easier to deal with. Because that would be the courts decision and not my ex's (if that makes sense)
Unfortunately I strongly suspect the ex will continue to play games and whilst I do wish for closure, I personally feel that sucummbing to his demands as another of his bullying tactics that I endured during my marriage.
Looking back, I acknowledge I was a weak person and I feel I need to do this both to show myself that I can have the strength when needed but also that no-one will take advantage of me again.

Thank you for the well wishes, I wish you the same in the future.

Hi Goblin

So at point of separation you had a three year marriage but before an 8 year period of cohabitation? If that is right the court will look at the 11 year period, not the three years of the marriage, as cohabitation that seemlessly moves into marriage is counted when looking at the assets.

In terms of your questions:

1.Valuation is now over a year old, my solicitor has stated a new one will need to be obtained but they didn't state whether I, stbx or the court will instigate this?

The court will order a new valuation given the state of the market. The solicitors will be given 14-28 days to agree the valuer, in the absence of an agreement, the court will appoint one. You and your stbx will pay half of the valuation report each.

2.Realistically, am I now elligiable to half the equity? The reason I ask is that I haven't made mortgage contributions (although I am liable with my name being on the mortgage) My solicitor instructed me not to make any payments due to me having to having to pay rent at my parents. I have regularly contacted the mortgage company to check payments have been made.

There is no reason why you are not entitled to half the equity. In respect of the lack of mortgage contributions, this is offset by what we call "occupational rent". That means that technically you were due a theoretical rent as you could not use your half of the property. Instead of paying you the rent, he pays your share of the mortgage. In short, a lack of mortgage contribution does not matter to your entitlement.

3.Will the assault play any role in the courts decision along with my change in living conditions? they are asking me about it in my paperwork so I'm wondering if it is of any great relevance?

No, I am sorry it doesnt. The only conduct that is taken into account in AR is financial conduct.

4.With the current housing market, it is probable that the new valuation will be lower. If this is the case yet I am still willing to buy him out at 38k will the court accept my offer with it being the greatest?

The court cannot force him to accept your offer. The court can order that as it's decision.

5.If this is so, will I have difficulties in removing him and his new partner from the property with there being a child involved? Does this partner and her child have any bearing on me and the courts decision and should I be requesting rent from this individual for the 2 years she's been residing there?

No. If you buy him out he will be ordered to transfer the property to you. If he doesnt complete the documentation the court will sign it for him. Once the transfer has taken place, if he does not leave the court bailiffs will assist him in doing so.

6.Finally and probably my greatest concern, my new partner. Will his finances some into play? My solicitor states that as I have not requested any maintenance this should not be an issue but I have concerns about the paperwork asking me about this.

As you are not looking at spousal maintenance they are unlikely to be of relevance, but it is information that should be before the court.

Finally, your pension. If you had paid into it for the period of the 11 year relationship, it is a matrimonial asset. However, at 32 the court are highly unlikley to order any division of this, and probably will not even see it as relevant.

If you can agree this and keep it out of court your closure will come easier and you can just sit back and enjoy life with your new partner. I understand what you are saying about not giving into him...but actually what you are buying is freedom to move on away from him. While you go through this process he is still a part of your life, and you may want to think about what it is worth to simply have him gone.

Amanda

Thank you ever so much for your input, it is much appreciated. I've nearly completed form E and feel I've put forward an honest case with evidence substantiating my finances. I hope the stbx does too and we can come to some agreement.

Thanks again everyone.