Housing options following separation

If she is unemployed she will be able to claim mortgage interest from the government for two years.

Hope this helps.

does that still apply if my name is on the mortgage as well as hers. If she cant pay they will come and look to me. if I cant as I am now paying for living costs in my flat then can she still claim?

Ok so after reading this i am so confused...
My stbx is very clever and organised ... i on the other had am not....

She has asked if i would agree to mesher order for her to carry on with the house payments ( we bought the house together) and we have been paying it for the last 11 years... The value is approx £185k and the remaining mortgage is £80k.. She has said this will be to allow her to live in the FMH for the next 10years when both the kids are in full time education and she can return to work full time...
She wanted to give me £50 in 10years time which i thought was a bit unfair as i now have to find a house to rent which is not cheap here and pay maintanance...
We have now agreed to a 50/50 split of the house sale in 10 years to give us both the chance of buying a house at that time....

We have split the finances / savings we have.. (sorry my stbx has as she did ALL the finances)this is after just 2 months!!!!!! I think she has had a bit more time to plan then the one day i had when i moved out an into a caravan after the words I DON''T LOVE YOU ANYMORE cam out at 20:30 on a Saturday night.... so 2 months on and i am in a right mess and she is pushing to get everything sorted ASAP including devorce under UB.... I can''t afford a solicitor so am on here... Any ideas on what the hell i should be doing next as she has total control and i''m ashamed to say to screwed up to think staight.. Although she thinks i''m stalling ...I am living off a mobile so can''t afford long costly calls..
Just a qiuck edit... i still love my stbx so this makes it even harder for me to deal with...

Please , please help....

Hi

I would say firstly is slow down, dont feel you have to rush at this just because she is.
I would then say that you need to get some form of advice and as you have stated you cant afford a solicitor then speak to Citizens Advice. If your ex still tries to push then say that you have to get advice and she will have to wait so that everything is done properly.
Are you eligible to legal aid in any form?
Also, in what way did you agree to split the house etc? has it been made into an order and submitted to the court yet? dont make any agreements without getting some form of advice. You are not trying to make life difficult for anyone but just trying to ensure that what is done is right.

As far as the pain and confusion you are feeling is concerned, it is natural when you have been blown away by this all. you need to remember that it takes two to make a relationship and while you have feelings for her, you have to let go. When my ex blew me away it ripped my world apart. I went to work and crumpled. I had a week off to get myself back together again. You need to get time to think so take some time out where you can. speak to people you trust and open yourself up a little. it helps to let go of a little of the stress and emotion. Dont make any agreements until you have had a little time to get your head around things and think of a plan. I would suggest that moving out was a bad idea. I refused and slept for 2 years on the sofa. Kept close to the kids and it helped me to keep a grip on the situation.

dont feel alone, lots of people on here who can offer help and advice. dont lose heart though yours has been torn apart.

Excellent article thank you. My wife wants 90% of the house and I can keep my pension. I am not working and was made redundant so I need the proceeds fro the house in order to get my own property. My wife is a teacher now but did not work for 12 years - so I am offering she keeps 55% of the house and half my pension and she can sell the house or buy me out when my youngest child reaches the age of 21. (I have two kids one is at uni and the other is doing his A levels. If she takes this to court will the courts recognise tht I need the money from the house now instead of keeping all my pension which is of no use to me right now.

I think one can safely say that the Courts will be concerned to make sure you are re-housed somehow. By the same line of reasoning, she needs re-housing too.

If your wife is a teacher the chances are she will have a pension. I can see the way her reasoning is going ; she gives you a nominal sum sufficient for a deposit on a rented home, and the rent is taken care of by housing benefit.

I think one would need to compare the pension entitlements here. If they are relatively similar then a pension split is not likely and so the proffered '' compensation '' for the virtual confiscation of the equity is not worth very much - if anything.

It''s always hard to look at housing when I don''t know where you live. Not that I particularly want or need to know, but the issue is what 45% of the equity would get you. Central London is one thing and Birkenhead is another.

For these reasons I find it hard to comment. Save only, perhaps, that if 45% of the equity will buy you something it should buy her something too when the kids are off your hands.

I have to say that 90% is virtual confiscation, and I would hope that a Court would be reluctant to make such a drastic order. I very rarely encounter cases where a Court has made such a severe order, but very little surprises me these days.

LMM

Hi Inaspin

It''s a difficult situation you are in, we can all appreciate that. Wraith''s advice was excellent: slow down. There is no need to rush these things. There is no need to keep to her timetable.

First of all I would get yourself established. It seems fairly clear that at the moment you are not going to see any money from the sale of the house. Therefore your first step ought to be to find somewhere safe to live if you haven''t already. Once you are settled in somewhere you will find that it is easier to deal with things and to organise yourself. You can also begin to sort contact arrangements too.