What happens if we don''t settle at FDR?

FDR next week. He takes home >100k per annum, my take home circa 20k. He has share options and bonuses every year. His CETV 500k +, mine 90k. House equity 400k so quite a lot at stake. Both 53, he cohabits, I don''t. Not really asking what would be a good settlement but if anyone has any thoughts please share! But what happens if we can''t thrash out a settlement? Does it go straight to FH? I know what I would settle for (and it doesn''t involve SM) but we have not heard anything from his side yet. Any advice appreciated!

You should have a few hours for FDR, so you should have a decent chance of ending once and for all, with luck the judge will offer some ideas on how to resolve it, but if in the end there is no agreement it will be listed for a final hearing.

Thanks Dukey. I''m just a little concerned he had my offer weeks ago and I haven''t seen his yet! Don''t want to see it for the first time at FDR but accept that will probably happen. (Quietly s*itting myself here!)

I got my first offer a week before and replied a couple of days before. Its all very last minute dot com.

I suppose all the facts need to be updated but its a poker game at the end of the day.

I was advised... Set your facts out and have an idea of what you will settle at minimum. And preparred to accept that rather than go to a FH with all the stress and costs that brings.

Seemed sound advice to me.

Well, back from FDR. I saw his offer 5 minutes before we went in! Judge advised Clean Break, 90% house to me, pension share (always a given), no ongoing maintenance. I did NOT accept as I felt his barrister was bulldozing me but that doesn''t mean I won''t! I need some further advice from the actuary as to whe I can take the pensions. I feel I should have maintenance (25 year marriage, vast salary difference) but some number crunching to do now.

90% is very high, what''s that in £''s?.

If it leaves you mortgage free it could be a decent offer, chances are if it goes to FH the next judge will order much the same.

House equity probably in the region of 400k. 300k will rehouse me. (Nice part of Hampshire).