Poor Form E, Poor legal advice, Poor offer and heading to court in a tailspin

Hi,

Casual relationship of around 6 years - not 'stable' (whatever that means!?) - there were lodgers and my partner was a student with very little income, and we moved, and we married in the 6th year when we were able to commit, but my health, always shaky, failed again after sudden death of father-in-law in my arms and partner communicated she wanted divorce after just 7 months.

I've suffered with my mental health, was sectioned during the relationship, which was why I could not commit, and the fact that my partner was a student, and post the divorce and after losing two jobs, was defrauded of all my savings of c£70k, I remain unemployed and I'm receiving residual PIP income. I have one non-marital historic property, with mortgage. She's claiming a 50% share of the only marital asset, a marital home I paid £76k deposit for - likely £70k equity left after sale. So, effectively she wants £35k and remains silent over the £20k loans I made to her for a car and debt repayments during relationship. She made no contribution at any point until she could work. So effectively she's trying to make off with £55k.

Our claim was the relationship was short (surely arguably less than 5 yrs) so should be put back as if never happened and receive each party's contributions back - but she claims she made contributions but didn't confirm them in monetary terms in form E, nor mentioned the debts owed to me. I'm told the next step is some form of informal hearing - and if that fails, we go to court (perhaps both steps are in court?!).

The loans owed (£20k) to me are more than half the £35k she offers and infers strongly she'll not repay which makes me very uncomfortable and my solicitor thinks legally I'll have little chance to secure repayment, and though 'Need' trumps 'contribution' - and though I have the need and made the only financial contribution, how can her solicitor advocate:
1) his client 'avoids' repaying loans (it was absent from their 50% offer) AND
2) think its fair to proceed to court when greater expenses are incurred, and my case is allegedly much stronger and
3) Her solicitor also claims, I have no claim for a spousal maintenance, all with the backdrop my ex received a significant inheritance, has a home and a job, which I have no prospect of having at present to due mental health? She works for the NHS, has pension, health cover, and earns probably over £30k and I receive probably around £4kpa (property profit and Pip). Her solicitor evens states not only that I don't have a claim for maintenance, that if I try he'll claim against me for legal fees...and
4) Also, how is it reasonable for anyone to have spent 18 months and £8k legal fees to be repeatedly called a liar, that I've been delaying progress, and whilst they insisted on Form E didn't even bother entering the ONLY critical factor of what her financial contribution was and her inheritance and now we're heading to court -
5) oh and I've also been threatened with a report to the police for harassment if I approach my ex with the intention of trying to express these aspects with a view to reaching a compromise because the solicitors stick to bureaucracy and legal speak and don't venture into attempting to find some ground which is likely to result in an acceptable settlement?
6) AND I bought and looked after two dogs and she refuses to accept one ought to be given to me?! But that's dealt with in a another court - more fees.

Finally they repeat they claim to want to resolve matters amicably and its a no blame divorce...Just what is going on?? If we go to court and the awards 50%, we'll each receive probably around £25k, after fees... but if she's awarded less than 50% say 25%, she'll get £7.5k?! plus dodge £20k loan repayment...How is this even remotely rational?? And my ex claims she holds no malice and doesn't want me unfairly treated and unable to make a fresh start?!?

Any feedback, anything, views, comments by anyone, with or without legal nous, id really be interested to hear it, thanks.

I am in a situation with an ex and we go to court next week. The lies on the form E and the excuses made are laughable, as are the ones your ex seems to be saying. I am dismayed to find its a telephone hearing but am currently working through replies to my queries. It's tough but if you find all your evidence, you do get chance to have your say, so I am told. Dont give away all your proof too early. It's a short marriage, so you should be entitled to most of your stuff back. (My exes solicitor says my 18.5 years is a short marriage) It gets really dull and is a lot of work. Have you asked questions about the Form E? you need to arrange a date to send these to the court and to exchange them with her solicitor. The court will have given you progress dates. What helps me... is remembering that he is paying his solicitor to bully me. It's not personal.

Hiya, that's for replying. Can't tell whether your male or female, not that it matters much I suppose. Her Form E is also laughable. Income needs are already in excess of her earnings, and then she claims she intends to buy a £350k house and a new car for £7.5k, so effectively needs around £380k and she literally has neither the earnings nor the capital nor the need for a new car as I bought her the last new car. She's literally turned into a lunatic, not the person I married or knew, whatsoever. She was not materialistic, now she wants a mansion and trimmings. Out of interest why is your ex claiming 19yr marriage is short? firstly, its not, saying so counts against your ex and also I understand its about the length of the relationship- i.e. pre and post marriage. Hence why, my 7 month marriage, is being claimed to be a short relationship, because that gives rise to the starting split of 50% assets. Cheers

My exes solicitor said it was a short marriage.. then when I mentioned this in court, he laughed at me.... however he was insisting the court hearing was a final hearing ( on zoom in the end) and the judge said 50/50 including the savings (result for me! previous offers from my ex husband have not included the savings). However I dug my heels in as the ex has told all sorts of lies and didn't argue back when the judge tried to make me sound incompetent. I brought up a ruling on mingling which seemed to flummox him, and I mentioned Rule 9.27a whereby both parties produce proposals. The judge said we can have another hearing but that I should seek legal advice....
(Like I hadn't already? ) Duuno how this relates fully to your situation, Maybe have a look at doing the proposals bit... what is she actually offering? If you can get that far at least it can lead to negotiation of sme sort. However, I got an email from my ex who said that if I didn't agree to his proposals there could be no negotiation.

Good to hear back from you. Nice to talk to someone about this stuff. who can relate a bit. I think our cases differ as yours undoubtedly justifies the commencement principle of a 50/50 split - which I know is all cases, but you must then apply the facts. Your 17yr marriage hugely exceeds the definition of 5 year marriage. I was married 7 MONTHS- which is why then the term of the whole relationship is considered- but the whole thing is only still 6 yrs, and thats not discounting the fact clearly you don't start from day one thinking you've committed to a long term relationship. So her offer is 50%, ignoring the fact she made NO contributions at all - I put in £76k for a home which after being sold is now £70k and she wants £35k. I cannot bring myself to accept that is remotely fair. No kids, and I lent her also £20k which she appears unwilling to repay, so effectively she's trying to extract £55k.

Legally I'm told she may be awarded 50%, but also, that I may be awarded 100% and she gets little or nothing, but I'm unlikely to succeed in reclaiming the £20k loan. Either way she wins. Clearly has no morals and no wish to consider the facts and make a reasonable offer. I can't fathom it. Her claim is £35k, she'll have spent £10k so far dodging giving information in Form E, and it'll be another £10k in court- so net if she's lucky is £15k - how's this worth it? It's just not. literally 60% fees to solicitors, and its money I've earned. My 7 month wife, during our 'relationship' bit, only worked 50% of the time and I paid more also. No matter how I look at it, the approach is very aggressive and has not care about the fees. Just can't understand it. And I'm p1ssed off with legal speak in letters when they could just talk plainly.