Hi, i am new to this site and need help, i will explain my situation (its long please be patient) and hope you can advise me what will be best.
In May this year, my parents went away on holiday leaving myself and my wife at home together. I have been married to my wife two years and love her very much, i lived to make her happy and gave her everything she ever wanted. Our married life had been amazing, but since she started her new job in december she slowly became distant, the last two months she was very distant and i tried everything to find out why things had changed but could not find the reason. While my parents were away it was our 2nd anniversary, i returned from work about 5pm and placed a card and teddy bear i purchased for my wife on the table in the lounge with another cards that had come in the post, my wife returned from work after 7pm, we said our hello's and how are days were. She opened the cards and then went upstairs to our bedroom. I stayed in the lounge watching tv, around 8.30pm i recieve a call from my sister to say that she has recieved calls from family members and friends that my wife had called them earlier to say our mattiage was over. On hearing this i went to our bedroom to ask my wife what is going on? why are you telling people our marriage is over? and tell me whats changed so we can work it out? My wife behaved in a manner that i had never seen, she became very tempered and started shouting insults which i could not understand, after a few minutes when my wife stopped her verbal attack she said 'right you just hit me' and walked into the washroom and locked herself, leaving me standing wondering whats just taken place, i have just stood there trying to find out what's happening to our marriage and not made any contact with my wife and in return i get verbal abuse and accused of hitting my wife! I go down to the lounge, i am completely shattered and can not believe what the love of my life is doing to me. 15 minutes later two police officers arrive and take me to the police station for assualting my wife, i am in shock. I am put into a cell, in the middle of the night a officer enters the cell and tells me after speaking to my wife she also accuses me of raping her several times during marriage, I am now mentally destroyed. The next day i am questioned for hours and then released on bail around 8pm, on returning home i find my wife has left taking most of her possessions and some valuable items of my parents.
I recieve a letter from my wife's solicitors few days later stating that my wife will be instigating divorce proceedings. A week later she filles for a divorce.
My wife, the women i always treated as a princess tried to destoy me. This all happening while my parents were away so nobody will stop her taking belongings from the home, managing to find a solicitor and getting the solicitor to send me a letter within days of being arrested, filing for a divorce so quick and accusing me of such serious allegations was one big masterplan.
I have recieved a petition which stated many reasons for unreasonable behaviour, all beinfg false. I dont have a problem in giving my wife a divorce and understand i can respond by agreeing to the divorce but not agreeing with the reasons, which would be a cheaper option aswell, but two of the reasons in the petition are of assualt and rape, and i do not wish to sign anything which claims such serious allegations. I know my wife and she will show all her family and friends the petion and that i gave her a divorce and these were the reasons for divorce
so i agreed i did them. I have asked her solicitor that i will give a divorce as long as the reasons of assualt and rape are removed but they dont wish to be civil.
What should i do?
Should i defend?
will i get justice or gain anything?
Will she have to prove her allegations?
Will i end up paying for her costs?
I am so confused by this whole thing, i believe if i get divorced it will be on real/truthful reasons, not lies and that nobody should be able to falsely accuse someone of assualt and rape to gain a quick divorce on unreasonable behaviour without proving her allegations are true. Please help/advise me.
In relation to the police investigations i am still on bail but have been told by the officier investigated the allegations that the case will soon be dropped as there is no evidence to back my wifes cliams.
I understand that defended divorces are expensive, but dont mind the expense if it will help me.